Notes from The Path Between Us: An Enneagram Journey to Healthy Relationships by Suzanne Stabile.
Slogan descriptors for each type
9s: risking conflict for connection
1s: things could always be better
2s: your feelings or mine?
3s: being everyone but myself
4s: go away but don’t leave
5s: my fences have gates
6s: question everything
7s: it’s all good
8s: vulnerability is not weakness
Highlights
Chapter 7
Singer-songwriter Michael Gunger, who is a five, explains the enneagram this way: “The enneagram is not about a pigeonhole. It’s more like: here’s a place where you hover and you can see how stress is affecting you, and you can see possible indicators about what you could do to alleviate the stress. That is very helpful, especially in building relationships.”
Conclusion
It is my hope that you will use the enneagram to offer love and acceptance and assurance to those people who inhabit your days and your life. I wrote this book for anyone who wants to do better at being in relationship with others. I want it to make a difference, but that isn’t up to me. It will be up to all of us to protect our relationships from anger, fear, and shame; to be compassionate when we see others struggling to think productively, act intentionally, and feel deeply; and to take seriously what others say about how they experience us in relationships and then use what the enneagram teaches to do something about it. Perhaps we could agree that in those moments, when we are healthy enough and mature enough, we will do what we can with what we know for the good of all.
Notes for Nines
- Learn to manage the tension between regretting being compliant and being afraid of being non-compliant
- relationships are best when you do not give up your own identity